If an outsider were to try to distinguish a fresher from a senior, its pretty easy, for other than the typical awkwardness, in certain cases the unnecessary boldness, the fearful trepidation shown in their faltering steps, there are some other unique aspects that differentiate the everyday CETian from the newbie. One such unique aspect is the dark rings around his/her eyes from sleepless nights of penning assignments not just for themselves but for the oh so wonderful merciful SENIORS. The good thing however about Archi is that very few seniors risk giving their drawing assignments to the freshers (except to a select few who are masters of the craft.. like the few in my very class, remember Art Attack....aa sweet redemption) for the results can often be catastrophic. Some birdie had already updated the seniors on my talent and so no drawing assignments came my way but that did not stop the barrage of written assignments. Now, there is no need to establish that outsourcing one's assignments is not allowed, so the practice is often (and sometimes not) handled with subtlety. How? Here again an outsider can try to spot a fresher through a few common scenarios (since I keep bringing up "the outsider" lets assume this outsider is very much interested in spotting freshers, since he either secretly believes he is Sherlock Holmes or is himself looking to outsource his own assignments).
Scenario 1: A long blind alley (actually a corner of the long corridor that is seldom visited) a few hushed whispers, the senior leans back onto the wall staring down at the floor, a few newbies who have trodden on the forsaken path sense the danger in the air and try to speed away but alas one is beckoned by the gangsta senior with the simple curling of his finger and the hoarse sound that he utters " hheeyy.. uuu". The papers are handed onto the trembling hands of the newbie and as the gangsta leaves, he says " Tom 10 AM"
Scenario 2: A confused newbie stands at the store outside college near to the bus stop. She still hasn't understood why she was asked to stand outside for showing the H and B on her HB pencil in response to the professors question " Do you have H and B pencils?" So as she stood there, from across the road, she sees a rustic young chap, a senior of course staring at her as he skips a few steps and jumps on to the small college gate and swings on it towards outside and springs off. What an Entry sirji or should I say exit. Pehla nashaa... ahem ahemm... ok back to the scene.... He crosses the road swiftly and continues to stare at her with a mischievous smile as she blushes and looks away only to steal a few glances every now and then. He grabs a paper from his friend, writes something on it, he is still writing as he boards the bus, and just as the bus leaves, he calls out," Hey.." and her heart jumps to her mouth, he leans out of the window and throws the paper to her, the one on which he had jotted down something a few minutes ago looking at her. She blushes as she secretly picks it up and wanting to read it in the privacy of her room rushes back to the hostel. The door is closed and she slowly straightens out the paper where it is written, "Ask Dhwani of F2 archi in your hostel for the Theory of Design Assignment. Copy and complete the assignment and give my copy to her ...Sasi" (Ok his name was not Sasi)..hmmm...There is an assignment behind every half baked love story.
Scenario 3: Govinda...Govinda...Govinda... in a background so reminiscent of a Ram Gopal Vermaish gunda gully, the sounds of dhobi ghaat nearby, while not so far away the sound of metal smashing against metal, a group of domineering and tyrannical individuals habit a corner as they stare down or in some case up at the newbies as they chew harshly on something and gulp it down with a large glass of liquid..... (Yes, you guessed it right its the mess hall, the mess chechis are literally throwing the plates onto the table, and the seniors are having a tough time consuming the puttu and payar). They call you over and ask with utter lassitude , "Do you have any work?" to which the newbie begins to reply, "Yes.. two assi...." when she is already interrupted midway by the senior, "Create a ten page writeup on Colonial architecture and give it to me by day after morning" And the newbie begins to say, " But I don't have t..(time)" when the cruel piercing look which says "remember your hostel intro is not over, your department intro is not over, do you want to be on my bad side" (yes all that in one look, ok, this senior might as well have been a kathakali expert) and the newbie is quick to complete the sentence with " t...the reference book." Of course the senior is not a total cold hearted ... lets say lady... she is kind enough to point out from where the reference is available, " THE LIBRARY".
Scenario 4: Now this one is a rare one, the newbie is standing in the department when she sees the senior come towards her. She has seen that walk before, she has seen that look, she knows what it means, its another assignment, so she quickly moves closer to the staff room where she is in direct view of the senior professor, a man who scares them all, and she secretly pats herself for her great idea, when the senior continues to walk towards her, she is confused, may be she was wrong, and as he closes in, he hands the paper to her and says "Tomorrow" while the professor looks away as if he had seen no evil, heard no evil and wasn't going to say anything let alone evil...Yes, sad truth, the practice is condemned but still is part of an unofficial ritual that has been passed down the ages right from when the professor was a student in the college.(I am guessing he pioneered it)
Escaping senior assignments in future is almost a no win situation. Doing it improperly means inviting the ire of your senior for years to come, doing it well means the assignments will continue to come your way for the rest of the first year. So one has to arrive upon a strategy that would be strictly half way, right there in the grey area, how so, here are some possibilities to try (keep in mind they are merely suggestions, have never been tried or tested to vouch for their success, at least I haven't heard of them)
Escaping senior assignments in future is almost a no win situation. Doing it improperly means inviting the ire of your senior for years to come, doing it well means the assignments will continue to come your way for the rest of the first year. So one has to arrive upon a strategy that would be strictly half way, right there in the grey area, how so, here are some possibilities to try (keep in mind they are merely suggestions, have never been tried or tested to vouch for their success, at least I haven't heard of them)
Develop a flair for bad spellings. "Reely" bad, see i just did it. That's got to discourage a few. Imagine Lorry Baker, structural colons, boy widows (instead of bay windows), the list is endless
Annoy him with your ray of sunshine - Make sure all dots of the "i" are made into a smiley. If asked you can always say you are a very cheerful person and give that wonderful smile.
The Trickle Down Effect: Drop water drops and smudge the assignment. You can justify the damage with the following excuses
- You had been crying since you developed calluses thanks to the innumerous assignments you had to complete both your own and those of seniors
- You generally tend to drool when you are excited about an assignment
- The senior reminded you of a neighbour who had tragically died of diarrhea (ok I am running out of ideas..)
The Tare Zameen Par/Boomerang effect: Tell them that ou have dyslexia and your assignments are generally done by others and enquire if the senior would be kind enough to help you with your own.
We certainly weren't very creative when it came to coming up with excuses back then but I am more than willing to lend my wisdom to the future generations. And to the question that is unanimously ringing out in your minds, "Why not just refuse the assignment from a senior?" Consider these assignments as a vaccine against the depressing and alarming number of assignments that are going to come your way in the coming years, believe me, its nothing short of an epidemic. In a way, your seniors are kind of prepping you for the future. And you can always carry the mantle forward.
We certainly weren't very creative when it came to coming up with excuses back then but I am more than willing to lend my wisdom to the future generations. And to the question that is unanimously ringing out in your minds, "Why not just refuse the assignment from a senior?" Consider these assignments as a vaccine against the depressing and alarming number of assignments that are going to come your way in the coming years, believe me, its nothing short of an epidemic. In a way, your seniors are kind of prepping you for the future. And you can always carry the mantle forward.
Note: And for all those who get repeat on your own assignments, here is a quick fix, a 100 % success rate solution. Most often your professors simply glance through the sheets and affix "repeat" on the cover page of the assignment. Its a random pick mostly, sort of a lottery, even though 40 of you have written the same assignment word by word. These repeat assignments are expected to be submitted at the end of the term and here is what you can do. Simply change the cover page, it really works, many of us have got through and even scored a 9 out of a possible 10. So much for strict evaluation, huh ?
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